7 reasons not to mess with a child

7 reasons not to mess with a child

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales. The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its' throat was very small.

The girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale couldn’t swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah". The teacher asked, "What if Jonah went to hell?" The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".

A kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work. As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.

The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."

The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."

Without missing a beat, or looking up, the girl replied, "They will in a minute."

A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five & six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor" thy Father & Mother, she asked, "Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"

Without missing a beat one little boy (the oldest of a family) answered, "Thou shall not kill..."

One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mom do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed her mom had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head. So she asked, "Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?"

Her mom replied, "Well, every time you do something wrong & make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white."

The little girl thought about this revelation for a while & then asked, "Momma, how come ALL of grandma's hair’s white?"

The children had all been photographed, & the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture. "Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you > > > are all grown up & say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'

A small voice at the back of the room rang out, "And there's the teacher, She's- dead."

A teacher was giving a lesson on circulation of blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, "Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, & I would turn red in the face."

"Yes," the class said. "Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?"

A little fellow shouted, "Cause -your feet ain't- empty."

The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray: "Take only ONE. God is watching."

Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.

A child wrote a note: "Take all you want. God is watching the apples.”